How To Be Uniquely You

Hello there,

I overheard something a few weeks ago while I was at work that I knew I needed to share.

What I overheard was a conversation that was between a young group of girls who couldn’t have been much older than 10 or 11 talking about their appearance. I was saddened with what I heard them saying. They were young beautiful girls who didn’t have an inch off their bones and they were saying that they needed to lose weight. Excuse me, what?

I can’t even begin to express how sick to my stomach I became when I heard this. It may seem like a silly conversation now, but I think about the effects it could have on them later on. It made me think about my self-love endeavor and how important it is to try to share it with others.

I know that this is a common issue. Society makes us second guess our appearance. It causes low self-esteem, low self-confidence, and concerns of self-image. Pretty much all things that include the word “self.” I understand that this happens to both genders but for women of all ages, it is especially hard. We are objectified most frequently and when we don’t look like those in the media who are “famous”, regardless of the platform you choose from, it doesn’t help any.

I have my own issues with self-esteem, I’m not afraid to admit that because I know I’m not alone in it. As I’ve gotten older I have started to accept who I am, I’ve started to accept how I look, and I have started to love the body I was given (ok, it’s a love-hate relationship but I’m working on the majority being love). It has taken me a while to get to the point where I am ready to accept it and I’m not a professional at it by any means. I’m not saying that I don’t still have those thoughts, I’m nowhere near having it down, but I work to maintain the happy healthy me and not get wound up in “ideal images” that are put out there.

So to those young girls here is my advice and what I’ve learned to shut out negative affirmations:

1. Tell your inner critic to shut it! Shut out that voice in your head that feeds you destructive thoughts and replace this voice with positive things and acceptance. Respond to that voice saying “No, no, no, we are not going there!”
2. Stop comparing yourself to others. It’s a trap! Unfortunately, it’s an easy one to fall into. We have all heard this I’m sure, but there is NO ONE else who is made exactly the same. We are all unique and that is the beauty of being our own genuine self. Comparing yourself to someone is a waste of time, there are certain attributes that you can admire in others but know that you have your own that people admire you for. BE WHO YOU ARE— DON’T TRY TO BE SOMEONE ELSE!
3. Most importantly: Be your own best friend. Do you think that your friends or family would tell you negative things? No! No friend would do that (if they do, they aren’t true friends). True friends and those who care about you would support you in who you are. They would compliment you because they know the flaws you see in yourself (you are your toughest critic) and disagree with all of them. They would stand by your side in your decisions because they don’t see how you could ever fail at something you put your mind too. Be your own best friend and support yourself the way you would those you care about!

Again I am not a professional at life. I am learning on my own how to live the happiest life I can. I remember how much I wish there was someone there to help me along the way and I still do when I encounter new obstacles. So, that is what I want to be for all of you. I know situations aren’t always the same but if anyone can take just one thing away, my job is done!

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